God’s sugar baby
Yo I haven’t written in about a month and few days and it’s because I have been overwhelmed but then this time most of it was from happiness and I honestly didn’t know how to write this newsletter
I think to some extent I’m a perfectionist, mind you this only appears to areas where it has to do with my life moving forward . The beginning of this year was sort of a lot for me.I was angry , depressed and frustrated. My life wasn’t looking like what I wanted it to look like and I wasn’t just having it. I was crying hot tears back to back everyday.
My safe haven which technically was my relationship wasn’t doing as well as I wanted it to and Omo everything was just so chaotic
And then the month of may came and I remember one of the days I had just finished crying, I remember just telling my sugar daddy that I wanted 31 days of answered prayers. My faith was strong but hours later it seemed like such a silly request. Hot tears again
Mind you , guys depression is real and for an anxious overthinking human like me it was hell. I wasn’t having peace of mind at ‘home’ work was another story entirely and my relationship another battle , I think that aspect suffered even a bit more cos I believed it was my safe space so why wasn’t it feeling so safe anymore . My SO was confused most of the time and I’ll always say that I’m thankful for the season this man entered my life cos if I was him I would have packed my donlup slippers and ran with how I was at that point.
Everything started to turn around when I got a new job, for some reason I started to get more peace than I had in a while and I decided to take a week break to you know try to destress and just relax. And that was the best decision I made this year.
And then my birthday, you guys four days to my birthday and I was already receiving gifts , it was a bit new to me ,this peace I was starting to enjoy .
Birthday eve and I decided to fuck my mood up by myself . I’m part of my own problems honestly cos I eventually cried myself to sleep, cried more in the morning, Got back to where I stay cos I was previously in my parent house and my birthday dress wasn’t ready , another round of hot tears.
Eventually I went to see man and my mood got better because I got a birthday surprise and I ended the day with people I love and people that love me just as much.
I started work two days after and guys I didn’t believe a 9 to 5 could be sooo good. I have been a lot better mentally and even found a bit of peace and stability, I haven’t been crying as much , I still have a bit of bad days and on some days I’m like over it but I have had a lot more good days than bad and I’m really grateful.
I’ll be sharing so much more in the coming newsletter , but really God has been good to me. See you soon
Love
God’s sugar baby